If you own this thing, you're definitely a tactard! Sheriff Jim Wilson blog.

You might be a TacTard if…

  1. That 7 pound AR you bought now weighs 10 ½ pounds due to all the gizmos and gadgets you’ve stuck on it.
  2. When getting ready for a date you can’t decide which pair of tactical pants to wear.
  3. You own a bayonet for your pistol.
  4. For Christmas this year you gave every member of your family their own personal bug-out bag.
  5. You’ve never shot a gun when you weren’t wearing tactical gloves.
  6. You never use that clip-on knife in your pocket because you don’t know how to sharpen it.
  7. You spend more money on guns & gear than you do on training and practice.
  8. Your idea of firearms training is watching Rob Pincus talk about guns on TV.
  9. The last actual violence that you witnessed was when you back-talked your mother. You ate the spinach anyway.
  10. Your wife constantly tells her friends and family, “He’s really harmless.”

Okay, so why should Jeff Foxworthy have all the fun? Add your own “You might be a TacTard if…”. Just please keep it clean.

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117 Responses to TacTards

  1. Heartland Patriot says:

    You might be a tactard if…the gear ON your rifle costs more than the rifle itself.

  2. Rob Pincus says:

    Wow… That # 8 is interesting.

    Is that supposed to be personal or could that have been watching ANYONE on TV?


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  4. Stanley says:

    The rifle needs a tactical iPod, tactical coffee maker, tactical TP dispenser, a trailer hitch and wheels. Anything else would just be shamefull waste tacticalness.

  5. Tyler Grant says:

    I get all of them, but not number eight. Could you go into your reasoning why?

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  7. Matt says:

    Who’s Rob Pincus?

  8. Sam Summey says:

    Who’s Rob Pincus!? Man where have you been hideing under a rock on GEICO commercial? Watch the Outdoor Channel!

    You might be a TacTard if you don’t know who Rob Pincus is.

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  10. George Pena says:

    If you know how many clicks to every corner of your property.

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  12. Rusty Gray says:

    Rob Pincus. I have seen him on TV. Does that make me a tactard too? All those years in the Army down the drain. Where is my cheaper than dirt catalog, I have to start buying tac options for my AR now. Can I just get an Airsoft one and pretend?

    ( on a side note, nothing but respect for Rob)

  13. Heartland Patriot says:

    I want my AR to be what it was intended to be: a reasonably lightweight, handy carbine with good handling characteristics. The only change I made to mine was to ditch the collapsible stock for an A2 (better cheekweld) and take the carry handle off and put a good quality, steel rear sight on it. It does what I want it to do and doesn’t have 20 gadgets hanging off of it, either.

  14. LexingtonNC says:

    If you sold your only car to buy your fifth gun.
    If your rifle sleeps inside the tent and your missus sleeps outside.
    If you ever canceled a date to use the money for ammo.
    If your idea of a perfect anniversary date includes 3 hours at a gun show and a rented John Wayne movie.
    If the hottest piece of lingerie you have ever bought is a bra holster.
    If you’ve ever called in to work sick because you were waiting for the UPS truck.
    If your sexual fantasies include watching girls fire large caliber arms while wearing BDU’s.
    If you can’t find your rifle in the dark.
    If you have a framed photo of all the various center fire calibers over your bed.
    If you dare not light a fire in your fireplace because of what is in the chimney.
    If your idea of prepping is “10,000 rounds of ammo and a hunk of beef jerky.”
    If your girlfriend’s bra size is “38 special” and her dress is “12 gauge”.

  15. Mick says:

    … if you have $2500 in your pistol, but have no idea how to run a revolver.

  16. Israel says:

    Appreciate it! It is definitely an remarkable web page!

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  18. John says:

    Haha. Pincus.

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  21. Jeff says:

    I like the older type of guns and I’m not much for these AR and plastic pistols that hold 20 shots. I like the old west guns like the side by side shotguns and the lever action rifles. They can do more than just work against bad guys. They can put food on the table too.

  22. That’s a smart answer to a difficult question.

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  25. Zach Campbell says:

    You know your a tax tard if you use a thigh holster for daily carry.

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